Music by Sergei Prokofiev, lyrics by the Society for Creative Anachronism, rampant lunacy by you
This song has been termed The Viking Birthday Song, The Mongol Birthday Song, The Barbarian Birthday Song, and who knows how many other variations. It originated in the Society for Creative Anachronism — so blame them. Other verses exist somewhere out there in cyberspace, and you can make up your own; but these are the ones I learned. It’s sung to the tune of “The Volga Boatmen”. If you’ve got an energetic/overstimulated crowd of people who don’t mind Attracting Attention To Themselves, include a sound effect after each “happy birthday!” (bang mugs on the tabletop, growl, whatever makes you dizzy with delight.)
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday!
Death, destruction, and despair, People dying everywhere
On your Birthday! Oh Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday!
May the candles on your cake burn like cities in your wake
On your Birthday! Oh Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday!
Birthdays come but once a year marking time as Death draws near
On your Birthday! But Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday!
Now that you’re the age you are your demise cannot be far
On your Birthday! But Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday!
Black Death has just struck your town you yourself feel quite run-down
On your Birthday! But Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday!
So far Death you have bypassed — don’t look back, he’s gaining fast
On your Birthday! But Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday!
When you’ve reached this age you know that the mind is first to go
On your Birthday! But Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday never fear, you’ll be dead this time next year
On your Birthday! But Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday!
We brought linen, white as cloud for the sewing of your shroud
On your Birthday! But Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday!
While you eat your birthday stew, we will loot the town for you
On your Birthday! Oh Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday!
This one lesson you must learn: First you pillage, then you burn
On your Birthday! Oh Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday!
Burn, then rape by firelight; add _romance_ to life tonight
On your Birthday! Oh Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday!
Your servants steal, your wife’s untrue, your children plot to murder you
On your Birthday! But Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday!
Just be glad the friends you’ve got haven’t found out you-know-what
On your Birthday! But Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday!
You must marry very soon — baby’s due by next full moon
On your Birthday! But Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday!
May your deeds with sword and axe equal those with sheep and yaks
On your Birthday! Oh Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday!
Let the women wail and weep, kill them all, but SAVE THE SHEEP
For your Birthday! Oh Happy Birthday!
Keywords: | lyrics | humor |
Posted by Laughing Muse • 1198 views • Share this link • Newer • Older
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